if I ever want to show a non-tumblr user how awesome this website is, I show them my blog.
That shit’s the best.
They should make a movie about Lenardo DiCaprio’s life. Then they should give an Oscar to the actor that plays Leo DiCaprio
He told me he and the guys were talking about how long they thought it would talk for him to get in my pants. And then he said at first, that’s one of the reasons he was hanging out with me.
He also said hurtful things about me leaving in May, like, “Don’t act like you care. When you leave, it’s not your problem anymore.” And in the car, he said something like “you’ll be leaving in two months when it gets bad for me.” I know he’s sick and it’s going to get worse. I don’t need him to make me feel like a terrible person. Who says that to someone?
I think he only spent money on me (despite me telling him not to over and over again) because he wanted me to get the illusion that he cared. That way, he gained my trust and he made me feel special.
And now that he knows I’m really upset with me, he’s using it against me (he texted this to me…) “Y would I spend all that money on you if I didn’t want you. I want you darcie I love you please don’t do this.”
No. You DON’T love me. You just want me to think that so I’ll trust you.
I’ve lost most of my trust in him. And I don’t want to do anything behind closed doors with him anymore. Cuddling and talking was wonderful. I loved that we could laugh and he made me happy. But he could never respect my boundaries and rules. He’d always challenge them and try to go beyond them.
When guys start talking about a girl like that; making a bet on how fast she can be brought to bed, it’s NOT ok. You shouldn’t go along with it and play it off. If he really cared about me, he’d tell them to grow up and that that’s not a way to treat a girl.
They all make me feel trashy and vulnerable and belittled. Why would they think that of me?
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE:
I guess I forgive him, if there’s anything to forgive. But we’re not the same anymore. I thought I was developing feelings for him, but that’s stopped. I’m embarrassed. I’m ashamed. I feel stupid and childish and gullible. I feel like the biggest joke in the world. And the worst part is, those guys in that class that were talking about me that way? They go to lunch with us and see us sitting together. I can only imagine what they are thinking…
Wow, Jamestown. Way to throw good guys in my life. You’re 0 for 2, and you better make this shit up to me.